Flo Rida and Juliet took the stage for the first awkward pairing of the night, followed by a group performance of "Bittersweet Symphony" by Chris, Lindsey Pavao and Katrina Parker. As the Verve tune concluded, Lindsey looked on the verge of tears: perhaps because she was so overcome with emotion, or perhaps because she was forced to sing a bittersweet symphony called "Bittersweet Symphony" with the guy who stood between her and the finals. Just a thought.
After the aforementioned bromance montage, Jermaine popped up again to sing, this time with Tony Lucca and Hall & Oates, who were the obvious choice to perform a song from 1977 on a television singing competition 35 years later. The song was pleasant enough, if not out of the blue, but wasn't it a bit cruel to force Jermaine to be a back-up singer again? That's like Daddy Warbucks adopting Annie and then deciding to chuck her back into the orphanage after buying her a nice coat from Best's. Unnecessary musical theatre references, comin' at ya.
(Commercial break: That annoying little Sprint girl said, "Watch out for my rooots," and I resisted the urge to throw my television out the window.)
Almost an hour in and still no mention of eliminations, but instead we're treated (is that the right word?) to a performance of "Superstition" by a random assortment of ousted women. Kim Yarbrough, Naia Kete (whose hair is BIGGER THAN EVER), Pepperjack Cheesa and Sera Hill brought the diva back to the stage, and all of them served as an interesting foil to Juliet, illustrating just how unique the last-standing female vocalist is in today's music landscape.
A ridiculously hilarious crossover saw Cee Lo heading into Pawnee, Indiana to take a pit stop at the Parks and Recreation department. Although seeing Ron Swanson in one of the spinning chairs was a gift in and of itself, I couldn't help but wish that Leslie Knope had donned Christina's tiny hat on her equally Aguilera-esque locks. Still, total success. Much more so than the pointless Cee Lo impersonation by SNL's Kenan Thompson that followed, which was even more bizarre than the blind auditions' Lorax promotion.
NEXT: Do we have a winner yet? Seriously, still no winner?