Wait, nevermind! Sharleen is in the hot seat! Chris sits down with "the most intriguing person we've had" -- a.k.a. weird -- to take a quick trip through the highlights of Sharleen's journey. Poor, poor Sharleen tries to cover her eyes during video of her first kiss with Juan Pablo, but there's no escaping that one, honey. We all saw it. Although, sadly, Chris does not ask her about it! You're off your game here, Harrison!
But he does ask her about her decision to leave. "I knew that he wasn't the one for me, like, ultimately." Sure, he's someone she would date, but, "We weren't airtight. We didn't get each other completely." With that, Chris brings up the "cerebral connection." What did she mean by all her talk of sometimes wishing she were "dumber?" Sharleen chalks it up to her thinking too much, even to the point where she can't sleep because she can't turn off her brain. Bottom line: They had great chemistry, and Sharleen will defend him. "It's not like our conversation was non-existent. I found him very curious. He wanted to know about me and other people and other lifestyles and about my experiences -- like, we had something to relate on." That being said, she was surprised to learn that she was one of his top girls throughout the entire process. (Spoiler: No one else was.)
Sharleen does not regret leaving. "I have a lot of respect for him, actually, and I thought he was very kind to me, and I didn't want to hurt him, and that's why leaving was that hard." Most interesting part of this entire show: Chris jokes about how Juan Pablo will be coming out soon and asks if there will be any besitos? Will she be able to maintain her distance? "I'll do my best," Sharleen says in that voice that I still can't read. Is she serious? Are these two going to make out? If so, please don't make me watch it.
Next up, Renee! The single mother says she wouldn't have done anything differently other than maybe tell him that she loved him during hometowns, even though she doesn't think it would've made a difference, because their problem wasn't about how she felt, but rather how he did (or didn't). So why were they so "slow-paced" as a couple? Does Renee think he used the kids card as an excuse? She's not sure. But, she does know that after telling her he wasn't kissing any women, "Twenty seconds later he was making out with Clare." Yeah, there's no way around that one. And sadly, there's also no way around the fact that Renee probably won't be our next Bachelorette, considering she's in a "situation" right now. "I am in a situation now where I'm very happy, but that's all I'm gonna say. I don't want to jinx anything. It's good," she says, to which Chris responds with, "The only way you might jinx it is if you call it a situation." Is anyone else secretly hoping her "situation" (and rumored engagement) involves Chris Harrison?!
From my first Bachelorette pick to my second, Andi's next in the hot seat. So what happened when the doors closed on the fantasy suite, and the camera crew left? I'll let her kick this one off: "It was fine for a little while, you know, we talked and we laughed and we kind of both breathed a sigh of relief, and it was nice to be away from the cameras a little bit, so I'm not going to take that away. I mean, we definitely had some fun times and laughed, and then everything was about his soccer and his traveling and who he knew. It was all about him. But there was just a lot of negativity. I felt like he was being extremely negative, and there were times where I felt like I was kind of getting sucked into that negativity."
What was he being negative about? "The whole process. I felt like he was being negative and not really grateful for the opportunity that he had. I think he thinks he was a very good Bachelor. I think he actually thinks he was a great Bachelor." And no, she's not being sarcastic. But in terms of what comments sent her over the edge, "There was a comment basically that I was barely here, that, you know, I had just barely beaten out Renee, something to that effect. I think he said 'default,' obviously that's an issue." And then when Juan Pablo mentioned his overnight date with Clare, Andi had a change of heart. "I remember thinking to myself, 'This will never work.' I remember just being mentally done at that point."
"For him to bring that up, I was just so shocked and so appalled by it. I really was." No, she didn't tell him that, and that was on her. But the important thing here is the little tidbit Chris seems to have gotten from someone: Andi pretended to fall asleep in order to escape the date! Suddenly, the idea of being stuck in a fantasy suite sounds like a great horror film.
NEXT: Andi defends Juan Pablo's "special ones"