Teams must switch from Ford Explorers to little dune buggies, then scurry around the dunes, following flags into the desert. I begin to have terrifying flashbacks of World 2: Desert Hill from Super Mario Bros. 3 as Nicky and Kim encounter a dizzying quicksand field and all teams languish under the constant threat of the Angry Sun. Pinky attempts to help out her punching bag, who's driving. "Try to, like, not be sideways," Marie counsels Tim, surprisingly not screaming this time. Meanwhile, the poor Bunninjas spin so much sand on the side of a treacherous dune that they lose their clutch (…on the competition!) and get further delayed.
At Al Ain Oasis (which is also difficult to find -- "This is worse than the laber-nith," remarks Jamal), teams search for clues, which are high-hanging fruits up in the trees, then instruct locals to retrieve them. "That's a cool way to climb a tree," says Nicole in modest approval, and really there's nothing else that could be said about any of this. Let's move on.
The RoboDocs say hell no to this leg's Detour and head right to the U-Turn station at Al Jahili Fort. They decide to U-Turn Leo and Jamal, who had previously denied U-Turning Brandon and Adam, like, eons ago. "The fact that they would just look us in our face and just lie to us -- it was just like whatever, here's your U-Turn," explains Nicole.
It's really absurd for any team to keep harping on this throwaway lie that never even affected them personally, but I guess that's what happens when the season is generally devoid of that many mini-dramas. Phil Keoghan knows this, but still had to ask the RoboDocs to explain their U-Turn anyway, at the end of the leg. And don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with "running this race in an honest way," but by that point the Afghanimals' stupid little lie seems like even less of a big deal… and even dumber the more everyone keeps mentioning it! OH WELL.
Detour: Wedding Guests or Beauty Contest? In other words: Endure the dreaded food-prep Quickfire Challenge from Top Chef or identify a prize-winning camel and dress it in Arab finery? Most teams choose to play dress-up.
Amy in particular has got this, she promises us ever so quietly in the back of her Ford Explorer. After all, she competed in beauty pageants for 13 years. "So if I can't dress up my contestant, I have some serious issues," she says, immediately after which a camel is shown groaning loudly. My TV didn't pick up any closed captioning here, but I believe the translation would be "Gurl, your dusty ass ain't even anywhere near our league [FIERCE KICK]." Something like that. Again, I'm not sure.
NEXT: Tim marvels that a camel knows he's hot (the camel, but they're both pretty hot)