Image credit: Fox
JAZZY STARS Mama knew best, but Nigel wondered if Hayley's dad knew what she'd been up to. Eww, Nigel.
A new top-of-the-show elimination format casts a weird and sad pallor on the rest of the dances. Fun!| Published Jul 3, 2013
How absurd is this new format? Last season, all the finalists danced and then we found out who'd been eliminated (from last week's votes) at the end of the episode. But tonight, the bottom six dancers had to face doom within the first few minutes of the show. Brittany Cherry and Carlos Garland were brutally eliminated right away…and then had to dance with their partners again mere minutes later! I've never heard of anything so awkward.
And to make it worse, Nigel started his whole "You're not dancing hahhhhhd enough" campaign early this time around. It's such a ridiculous conceit, that these people aren't putting everything they've got into these tiny solos (that the judges DIDN'T EVEN DELIBERATE because they'd already made their decisions). Just senseless bordering on hurtful drama from Nigel, and no one is buying it. I don't think he'll be happy until someone actually dies onstage while dahncing for his or her life. These people simply aren't tottering far enough off the edge of the cliff for him! They don't care enough about still being alive... for the next 30 seconds!
Mariah Spears and Jade Zuberi also had to dance for their lives... and Mackenzie Dustman and Alan Bersten landed in the bottom six but were immediately "saved" by the judges.
Those cuts, though. That was way harsh, Tai. I actually thought Brittany and Carlos had the best solos of the four -- Brittany with her crazy energy and crazy sexy cool hair and Carlos with this insane split jump that looked as effortless as a handlebar mustache fluttering in the breeze. (That doesn't mean he wasn't trying, though, Nigel.)
Hayley and Curtis -- Jazz choreographed by Ray Leeper
Music: "Mama Knows Best" by Jessie J
Maybe it was the shell shock of those eliminations, but I wasn't as floored by this sexy black leathery jazz number as the judges. I found it a bit too fluid in parts, if that makes sense, like some of the movements needed to be more punctuated. That might be what guest judge Christina Applegate meant when she told the pair they should have "moved into the words" more. It seemed like Hayley was scared of falling in those heeled boots. And the "Curtis is not a bad boy in real life" hammering-home during rehearsal footage made all those butt-grabs he had to execute on Hayley feel a little cheesy.
NEXT: Two Nappytabs routines starring: Horny People