Phillip then goes over to tell Matt and Michael how awesome his alliance is. “I still operate Stealth ‘R’ Us left and right. I won’t take new members, but it’s a force to be reckoned with in this game.” (Side note: What’s the point of having the word “Stealth” as part of your alliance name if you not only tell everyone about your alliance, but even go on to tell them what the hell it’s called?!? YOU CAN’T BE STEALTH IF YOU TELL EVERYONE YOU ARE STEALTH! BY DEFINITION OF THE WORD, IT CANNOT BE DONE!)
Adding to the confusion, Phillip then tells M&M their first test will be that they are going to be told by other people in his tribe to do something, and that they should do it. Unless he tells them differently, in which case…they shouldn’t do it? I guess? I’m sorry, but does anyone know what the hell Phillip Sheppard is talking about? Is this a trick test? Because I still don’t understand what the test is. But hold the phone — what’s this? He has t-shirts?!? Putting aside the fact that having an actual Stealth “R” Us t-shirt just may be the least stealthy maneuver in history seeing as how you are turning yourself into a walking advertisement for an alliance that prides itself on the art of deception, I totally want one! Does it have the Stealth “R” Us logo on the front and a personalized code name on the back? Can mine say “The Analyst”? Hell yeah, I’ll take any stupid test you want to get one of those bad boys.
Here’s where things get interesting. While the initial plan is to vote off Whatsherface since the tribe still needs strength in challenges, Cochran brings up an interesting point as well: Matt and Michael are very tight and it might be a good thing to break them up. Plus, they are all pretty convinced Matt does not have the idol by his clear desperation and willingness to do whatever they say. Dawn sides with Cochran, while Phillip and Corinne still want to oust the weaker Julia, believing they can flip M&M later at the merge if needed. Viewers no doubt side with Corinne, who says, “I would love to get rid of Julia because A) She’s really boring.” Corinne goes on to say that “She literally does not contribute anything except a nasally voice,” but we wouldn’t know because we have never actually heard her speak.
So which way will it go? At Tribal Council, Duck Dynasty tells Probst how stoked he is to play with all these people that he’s such a big fan of — hold that thought — while Corinne discusses her fear of the hidden immunity idol. Finally, Cochran describes the other tribe as, “the bold and the beautiful group. I don’t see me necessarily penetrating that group.” (Penetrating may not have been the best word choice there.) In any event, Matt is the one who is voted off, putting an already physically inferior tribe that much more at a deficit. And judging by the preview for next week — which shows a restaging of the classic chase-these-people-in-a-circle-while-carrying-weight challenge first seen in Palau, they could be in some serious trouble.
And you’ll be in serious trouble if you don’t read this week’s Q&A with host Jeff Probst. Likewise, make sure to check out the exclusive deleted scene from last night’s episode in the video player below. And come back later on Thursday for our InsideTV Podcast exit interview with Matt. Finally, for more Survivor scoop, follow me on Twitter @DaltonRoss.
Now it’s your turn. Who were the biggest winners and losers in the tribe reshuffling? Did the Faves on Bikal send the right person packing? And what would your Stealth “R” Us shirt say on the back? Hit the message boards to let us know, and I’ll be back next week with another scoop of the crispy.