Survivor recap: Tears, Beers, and Fears

There’s lots of crying, and drinking, and people worried about what their next move should be
Ep. 11 | Aired Apr 24, 2013

COCHRAN SANDWICH Thank God this wasn't part of the food-eating challenge.

Greg Gayne/CBS

And wouldn’t you know, that's exactly what happens. Cochran wisely uses his advantage at the first opportunity, thereby maximizing the time of his advantage, and really, after he does that, it’s clear nobody stands a chance of beating him. (Remember: The contestants are not holding the same amount of weight. They are holding weight proportional to their own body weight at the start of the game, so even without the advantage, Cochran is holding less weight than Eddie, Reynold, or Malcolm. Throw in the advantage and it is a large discrepancy.)

While Cochran deserves credit for being the one to purchase the advantage, saying that “I am the greatest challenge competitor in Survivor Caramoan. There is no debate. If you look at the scoreboard, I’m demolishing everybody” might be overstating his case a bit. This is why I’m not a fan of the immunity advantage twist. I don’t want to see how Cochran stacks up with a two-slot advantage. I want to see how he stacks up head to head.

So without an immunity victory or an immunity idol in their possession, Lucky Day, Dusty Bottoms and Little Ned Nederlander must make people think they have an idol so they can scare someone into flipping. They work Sherri and Erik hard, who both appear torn on what to do. Dawn is fearful that The Silent One may turn on them, explaining that “If I didn’t have diarrhea I wouldn’t be so nervous.” Can I pause for the cause and ask a question: What is with Dawn Meehan and diarrhea? The woman can’t shut up about it! I understand that your only two options out on the island are diarrhea or constipation and neither are particularly attractive options, but must we constantly be discussing the consistency of contestants’ B.M.’s? The only thing I'm nervous about is that Dawn Meehan is going to keep talking about diarrhea.

At Tribal Council, Cochran says that Sherri’s peanut butter smothered fingers have nothing on voting out Malcolm, which would be “indescribably delicious.” Indeed, nobody plays an idol and we have a three-way between Reynold, Andrea, and Malcolm, which is to say a three-way tie, not an actual three-way, which would only be available for viewing on Showtime’s Survivor: After Dark. Malcolm is eliminated on the revote, yelling out “I need a drink!” after having his torch snuffed. In the silver lining department, at least this one won’t cost him $20.

Two interesting things before we wrap up. First off, Malcolm says in his parting words that he was so confident that he had Sherri and/or Erik that he would not have even played the idol if he had found it. Malcolm is a great player, but at a few points this season he revealed himself to be too easily bamboozled by people who professed loyalty to him. Second interesting point: Since the merge, only one Fan (Michael) has been voted off, while three Favorites (Corinne, Phillip, Malcolm) have gotten the boot. If I’m Eddie or Reynold at this point, I am looking at the other and saying “What the hell are we still doing here?!?” Unfortunately, Eddie is probably still too busy mulling over the possibility that some hottie back home is going to find out he ate “cow’s d---.”

Speaking of food, make sure to feast on this week’s Q&A with host Jeff Probst. And because we love you, we also have an exclusive deleted scene in the video player below. Also make sure to check back Thursday afternoon for our InsideTV Podcast chat with Malcolm, which is sure to be entertaining. And for more Survivor scoop, follow me on Twitter @DaltonRoss.

Now it’s your turn. Are you sorry to see Malcolm go? Does it shock you that players spend money for food over help in the game? And do you like the challenge advantage twist or would you rather see everyone compete under the same conditions? Hit the message boards to let us know and I’ll be back next week with another scoop of the crispy!

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