Survivor recap: The Spy Who Shacked Me

Tony's scheming doesn't seem to rattle anyone in his alliance except for Jefra, who must make a life-altering decision over ribs.
Ep. 09 | Aired Apr 23, 2014

INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY: Tony demonstrates that his bag of tricks is still chock full of surprising talents, including (but not limited to) prehistoric architecture, low-level espionage, and general sneakiness.

Michael Yarish/CBS

As Tony’s off on his idol hunt, Jefra is cornered—well, in open water—by Trish and Kass, who easily wrench it out of her that Tony's lying has gotten on her nerves. Kass mistakenly reads Jefra’s concerns as Tony being more annoying than untrustworthy, which is yet another painful underKasstimation of the problem here. Even though Tony likely won't flip again because he couldn't beat Tasha or Spencer, I still can't handle the coolness with which Kass and Trish accept his infidelity. But I suppose your interpretation of their forgiveness of Tony is rooted in whether you think Tony would beat them in the final three. I do. They clearly don’t.

Tony arrives in the water, and Trish and Kass (can I collectively call them Trassh or is that just rude?) call him out on his double agency, which he vehemently denies with a casual “Don’t insult me, bro.” Rather than apologizing, Tony gives some BS excuse and swears on his baby/father/mother/landlord, and just like that, he’s gotten them all back under his thumb. It’s this truly inexplicably effective social game that makes Tony such a great Survivor villain, and so infuriating at the same time.

Jefra, being honest to a fault yet again, tells Jeremiah that she’s not going to flip after all. Again, poor Jefra. I really wish she had listened to her mother. Hidden inside that petite little head is a major existential dilemma that just doesn't know what her best option is, like when you have to choose between watching Game of Thrones or Mad Men and genuinely can't decide which spoiler would upset you more. Perhaps Jefra should just run all of her life choices by Kass, who, lest we forget, knows “how to read people.” (She neglects to mention that she can only do so at a fourth-grade level.)

As Jeremiah delivers Jefra's bad news to Tasha and Spencer, he seems to accept defeat and decides that now is the best time to reveal the excruciating secret that he’s been keeping inside of him, burning a hole through his heart with agonizing, searing pain every time he must lie about it. Lifting the weight of the world off his gorgeously chiseled shoulders, Jeremiah confesses: “I’m a fashion model.”

“If you Google my name Jeremiah Wood and just put ‘model’ afterwards, you can see some.”

photo

Yep, found it!!

As Jeremiah now rests easy and breathes sexily, Spencer comes forward with a confession of his own: he has an idol. (FYI I legitimately thought maybe he was about to come out, which would have been completely unnecessary and totally awesome.) “The game is not over!” Spencer cheers, and that leads us into…

NEXT: Tony thinks people actually care about his fake idol

Latest Videos

Advertisement