Survivor recap: Too Little, Too Late

The castaways finally decide to make a move against Tony, but it's pointless due to the two immunity idols in his bag of tricks
Ep. 11 | Aired May 7, 2014

HITTING THE WALL A plan is put in place to take out Tony but that plan is about three Tribal Councils too late

CBS

We head to the immunity challenge to see if Tasha can tie Kelly Wigglesworth for the record of four individual immunity wins in a row. Hold on…Kelly Wigglesworth holds the record for most consecutive individual immunity wins? That honestly shocks me. I would have thought someone like Terry Deitz or Tom Westman would hold that record. Maybe my surprise is also because all I remember about Kelly and challenges is the professional river guide who described herself as a “water all-star” getting smoked in a paddling competition by water-phobic Gervase. You know what Kelly’s problem in that challenge was? SHE LET THAT FOOL HER!!!! Don’t let that fool you, Kelly. Just don’t. (Please make sure to watch the entire clip. First of all, so weird without any Probst play-by-play. Secondly, so not weird to see Gervase celebrating like a maniac after his victory. Some things never change.)

It’s a super windy day at this challenge. You can tell by the trees flapping in the breeze. You can also tell by Trish sticking her hands under her armpits as if she’s preparing to set the world record for loudest armpit fart noise. Probst explains the rules and the rules are these: Eveyrone must run out to six different stations, counting how many of each object are at each station. Then they must run back and put all those numbers in on a combination lock. First person with the right combo wins.

The contest turns into an exercise in futility as every player keeps trying different combinations and keeps coming up empty. Finally, after 25 minutes, Tasha, Tony and Kass all race to their boxes and put in their latest guesses. They’re all wrong, leaving Spencer to finally win it. And, as Spencer is wont to do, he goes big on the victory pose, collapsing with his head in his hands in the sand. I love how Spencer talks all mature and intellectual, but then reverts to acting like a little kid when anything awesome or awful happens — alternating between over-the-top celebrations and impetuous temper tantrums. (And Spencer hates kids!)

So the plan is in place to either vote Tony out (impossible) or force him to use one of his idols (meaningless). Tony realizes something is up when Tasha doesn’t even attempt to scramble, but why should he care? Then Tasha becomes yet another person to fall victim to the Survivor scourge that is Russell Hantz, because after she compares Tony to the Texas tornado, a light goes on in Kass’ brain. Why should she allow Tasha — who will easily beat her — to stick around when she can keep the beatable Tony instead? As she says herself, “Nobody ever gives the jerk the money.”

There actually is a medical term for this: Bitter Jury Syndrome…or BJS for short. Symptoms of BJS include bruised egos, lingering obsessions with revenge, and the sudden ability to come up with irrational rationalizations for giving the money to a less deserving player instead. International clinical studies conducted on test subjects in both Panama (test name: All-Stars) and Samoa (test name: umm…Samoa) have proven BJS to be serious condition that can lead to long term delusion if not treated properly. Please see Dr. Ramona immediately if you believe that you too may be suffering from BJS.

NEXT: So long, Tasha!

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