Sun Tzu would be proud. The opening moral of last night’s episode of Star Wars: The Clone Wars could have come straight out of The Art of War: “All warfare is based on deception.” Kark yeah! It’s about time the Jedi get down and dirty to fight this war. They’re certainly not going to win it by heroic derring-do and high-handed moralizing alone. I mean, they’re really, really not. Actually, they’re all going to be exterminated. But maybe if they had adopted a little bit more of the cloak-and-dagger tactics we saw in “Deception,” from not only Cad Bane, Boba Fett, and Bossk, but one Obi-Wan Kenobi as well, they could have survived this turkey shoot. Or bantha shoot, as it were.
Actually, the whole plot of “Deception” reminded me a lot of Day 3 on 24. If you recall, Jack Bauer earned the loyalty of a hardened Mexican drug lord (played with typically gritty flamboyance by go-to villain Joaquin de Almeida) by helping spring him from prison. What? Our Jack had gone rogue? Well, it seemed like he had, anyway, until about five hours in when we learned it was an elaborate undercover operation to infiltrate the drug lord’s cartel and discover its terrorist connections.
In that Galaxy Far, Far Away, the Separatists had set in motion a plot to kidnap Chancellor Palpatine. Since he’s secretly pulling the strings behind both sides of the war, one wonders why he would want to orchestrate his own kidnapping at this particular point. I don’t know, maybe he wants to establish firmly enough in people’s minds that the Seppies want his hide so that when it happens for real at the beginning of Revenge of the Sith, nobody will blink twice.
The mastermind of this anti-Palpatine conspiracy? A bounty hunter named Moralo Eval, who I think must share some mutant DNA with Batman’s Killer Croc. But on their way to a meeting at the Jedi Temple about this evil plot, a more sinister foe awaited Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Ahsoka, and not one of the drunken revelers pouring out of Coruscant’s unending string of nightclubs, cantinas, tap cafs, and spice dens. (Despite being the urban center of the Galaxy, Coruscant really seems more like a planetwide version of Times Square in the ‘70s: a death-stick dealer down every alley, and a Twi’lek hooker standing on every street corner. Seriously, though, steer clear of the Twi’lek hookers. You don’t want to tangle with their Weequay pimps.)
NEXT: Obi-Wan becomes One with the Force.