Once Upon a Time recap: Boat Show

Yo ho, yo ho, a (surprisingly dark) Hook episode for us!
Ep. 17 | Aired Apr 13, 2014

Jack Rowand/ABC

Of course, nobody sees through his act. The Charmings enthusiastically volunteer Hook for a trip to the pawn shop, where he and Ariel may be able to find an object of Eric's to use in a locator spell. And, lo and behold, Eric's fetching Ursula-clasp cape is ready and willing to take them princeward. You know, to Eric -- not Prince. Although if that happened, this would automatically be history's greatest OUAT.

As Ariel and Hook follow the ghostly torso of Eric's cloak, Regina is finally giving Emma some much-needed (and long overdue) magical training. They begin in Regina's crypt, where it seems like we're in for a heart-pounding afternoon of book-learnin'; when that proves not nearly exciting enough, Regina transports the two of them to an undisclosed woodsy location. The queen stands on a cliff; she's thrown Emma onto one of those incredibly dangerous rope bridges that only seem to exist in adventure stories. It seems Regina has decided to ape the teaching philosophy of Rumpelstiltskin, and also Heather Chandler: If you want to f--- with the eagles, you have to learn to fly.

So Regina starts destroying the bridge, urging Emma to save herself via magic. Emma fails, falling to her death.

Obviously, that doesn't happen (though wouldn't Once be a more interesting show if it had?). At the very, very last moment, the savior manages to cobble together a sort of floating Huck Finn raft out of the bridge's debris, floating herself safely to the other side of the chasm. The danger is over!

No, wait: The danger has just begun. Because Charming has decided that in order to trick his grandson into thinking David's fun and cool, he's going to teach the little scamp how to drive. Can Henry's feet even reach the pedals? Oy, this may be the dumbest idea Charming has ever had -- although I do feel a little bad ragging on the guy the day after Josh Dallas's real-life wedding to Ginnifer Goodwin. Okay, resolution: Instead of paying attention during this scene, please spend its duration looking at cute pictures of Josh and Ginny.

Ready to tune back in? You'd better be, because Prince Eric's ghost cloak has just led Ariel and Hook to the harbor... where it disappears into the water. Is Eric just watching the newt play the flute and the carp play the harp under the sea? Nope; it appears that after all this, he's taken a one-way trip to Davy Jones's Locker.

NEXT: A kiss is just a kiss. Unless it's a cursed kiss. Then it's a cuiss.

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