Juliette learns the truth about "Char-livia," which People magazine voted "the world's most interesting couple." Based on what?! I have to know. It can't be either of their personalities. I hope it's something creepy. We'll probably never find out.
Olivia, a bad, mean, abusive type of rich person compared to her husband's sweet, angelic, self-effacing type, is constantly slapping Charlie in the face and taking off in their jet.
But not tonight! She walks in on a very steamy Juliette and Charlie sex scene in their hotel room, then slips out. The new lovers are both so enamored by Juliette's racy lingerie (missed opportunity for a repeat appearance by Thong Dress, I say) that they don't even notice her standing there! It could be love!
The pair's mutual attraction will endure a six-week trial period, as Juliette and Charlie agree to headline and sponsor some sort of music festival designed to keep Mayor Teddy involved in the show.
Deacon's there, too, as a somewhat reluctant date to his lawyer lady, Megan, whose firm sponsors this annual snobbery. There's a very easygoing vibe to their romance so far. Every time he presents an impossible situation -- alcoholism, depression, has daughter with Rayna, is still in love with Rayna -- she's fine with it! That's the gist of Megan. She accepts all of his crap and likes him anyway. And she's making Deacon happy -- something you wouldn't imagine possible considering he started the season clutching his club hand while going through massive withdrawals in a prison cell. I say good for Deacon. He needs to heal. Rayna will still be around….right?
Luke Wheeler's there. Doin' cowboy things. Askin' Deacon "So you and Rayna….?" before getting brutally cut off by Megan. She's fine with it.
Rayna's there, of course. With Lamar's assets frozen and Rayna James' ass not about to be kissed by Edge Hill head Jeff Fordham like she so firmly requested last week, the queen of country music has to beg for handouts from the dreaded disposable income snobs in order to give her independent label Highway 65 a fighting chance.
Trouble is, no one trusts Rayna's family after the allegations against Lamar went down. Tandy (Rayna's sister's name -- I continue to be as surprised as you are) is particularly suspect, as she's been Lamar's CFO and right-hand figurine for years. Not even those recurring bitches Myrna and Patty -- huge fans of Rayna's -- will entertain her wild propositions like "Please invest in the arts."
I partly blame Rayna's demure polo ponytail for the $0.00 donation amount collected in her giant hat. There was only one giant loose, beautiful wave in that thing, and depending on the camera angle, sometimes it didn't even look that friendly.
NEXT: Scarlett attempts to go Kate Bush on us (range-wise)