Glee recap: Broadway Bitches

Chris Colfer pens a special episode that finally features a storyline just for Kurt, and more dogs and June Squibb than you might have imagined.
Ep. 19 | Aired May 6, 2014

Tyler Golden/FOX

But there's more to the story than that. Saint Kurt goes to see Clara the high powered attorney to let her know that he mom would love nothing more than to see her at the Peter Pan performance. Clara informs him that the reason she doesn't go see her mom is because Maggie chose everything else over her when she was growing up, especially her career. She missed her graduations and her games and her own plays, so why should she go see her 84-year-old mother in something now? I think it's a pretty fair argument, but Kurt pulls out the trump card just as she's about to have him escorted out her office: "My mom died when I was eight and I spent my entire life pretending that I had one...your mother couldn't take care of you when you were little but you could take care of her now."

Broadway Betches: Rachel's dog adoption event is a huge success; Santana has the press all arranged to come out later, and has picked out the perfect three-legged dog for Rachel to pose with. But when someone tries to adopt that dog and Rachel won't let her, the woman figures out what's going on. Like every single person in New York, she reads the Broadway blogs and knows that Rachel is just trying to save her image: "You don't care about these dogs. I doubt you care much about anyone but yourself." Preach, lady in jeans and tennis shoes. Rachel's face goes thoughtful, as if this isn't a lesson she's had to learn over and over again.

Blaine finally shows up in the near vicinity of Kurt to help prep him for his big Peter Pan debut. Squibb is dressed in a nightgown and hair ribbon as Wendy and looks just fabulous. Kurt calls Rachel backstage to tell her that even though things have been tense, he still hopes he event goes well and he's glad he has a friend like her to inspire him. She's all, "That's sweet Kurt, but I've gotta go, I have my best friend's play to watch." He looks out at the audience and there she is with the whole New York crew. Ugh, I hate that it gets me every time.

Then, suddenly, Kurt is spinning from the ceiling in a harness singing Madonna's "Lucky Star." It. Is. Awesome. His feet hardly touch the ground the whole time. He just cruises around the stage in the air while Maggie sings below him with all her might and all of the older gentlemen do the cabbage patch in nightdresses in the background. It does not get weirder or better than a disco performance in a retirement home. It's not Mary Martin, that's for sure. A

The show ends, Maggie is reunited with Clara, who decided to take the first step with her mom after all, and just as Kurt is wishing more people could see the former legends do their thing, his friends announce they've brought a bus from Artie's film school and they want the Lexington Home gang to help them perform at the Broadway Bitches event.

Rachel introduces her guests of honor and the opening number: "As New Yorkers, we get so wrapped up in our careers…we forget the importance of creating a legacy we can be proud of." The whole crew breaks into "Take Me Home Tonight," and it's the first big group number in a while. The addition of the diner guests, the dogs being shopped around, and the old folks make for a pretty action-packed performance. It's actually a little hard to focus, but I do know for sure that Sam and Mercedes ended up finding a good future home for McConaughey. Or, at least, the way that older couple was dancing with him looked like they could handle taking him on the Doggy Gauntlet of Doom should he ever want to return. The New York Theater News reporter Santana kept pushing is finally there, and she's impressed with Rachel's cause. Rachel gives all the credit to her publicist, Santana, and her inspiration, Kurt. But they give it right back to her -- friends forever, and all that.

All in all, I thought the song choices were a little odd, but the performances were perfectly crazed. The jokes were more subtle than usual, but also had all the wit without the mean-spiritedness that can sometimes taint this show. Most importantly, Cofler showed a real respect for the characters we've come to know and love/hate. Not bad at all for a first-time TV writer, I'd say. I would definitely be up for more Colfer-penned episodes in Glee's final season (final season!). Would you?

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