Glee recap: Poor Little Broadway Girl

Rachel gets bored with her dream of being a Broadway star and entertains other ideas of entertaining; Mercedes and Blaine both push the boundaries of generosity and logic to accommodate Santana and Kurt, respectively
Ep. 18 | Aired Apr 29, 2014

Tyler Golden/Fox

Blaine has spent the whole week with June. She has been completely charmed by him and wants to host some sort of showcase to him. He just has one very small request from the woman who's already giving him everything: he wants Kurt to be in the showcase too. "We really want to do everything together, and I think that the world really needs to see his talent too." Dude, look alive; this is not what marriage means. June agrees with me; even though he didn’t ask, she tells him she thinks he should call off this engagement. "Are you going to settle, or are you going to venture out into the unknown like a Samurai and realize your full potential?" When I think Blaine, I think Samurai -- so it will probably be the latter.

No, wait, I was wrong. Blaine tells Kurt he’s going to be in the showcase with him even though June explicitly said no. This should all turn out really, really well.

In case you weren't feeling enough like everyone is totally blowing it, it’s time for Rachel to meet with Sydney as he requested after she e-mailed him to tell him what happened in L.A. For just one moment, you think he’s going to let her off the hook because she’s his star. Then he rips into her in a truly masterful way. If you were someone who had been frustrated with Rachel’s irresponsible actions all episode (I've already made a Facebook group for us), then you probably felt a little bit vindicated seeing Michael Lerner look her dead in the eye and say, "I wanted to fire you. I spoke to Rupert, the other investors, they all agreed you’re an ambitious, irresponsible child." But he’s not firing her. Rachel is their star now, and they need her -- but this will not be the supportive relationship it once was. He doesn’t believe in her anymore, and he tells her straight up, if she ever does anything like this again, he’ll fire her, sue her for breach of contract, and make sure that her Broadway reputation is irreparable. "Now get the hell out of my office."

The episode should have ended there. It was brutal, sure, but it was a valid response to what Rachel risked. She could have just learned her lesson. What happened next could have happened later, after we’d had some time with Repentant Rachel. Instead, a Fox executive calls to say that she didn’t get the role, but they want to offer her a development deal for a TV show of her own. Her excitement again seems like that of a child: she's defiantly going for the cookie she's been told explicitly that she can’t have. It also happens to be on a burning stove that she knows she's not supposed to touch. I did at least appreciate that this episode established stakes that will carry on to the end of the season. Whether they’re illogical, life-ruining, or perfectly-assessed risks that my sorry ass should have never questioned is still TBD.

If you didn’t watch and you’re wondering why I didn’t mention Sam or Artie, it’s because they weren’t there -- and no one tells us why. If you’ve been wondering what happened to Brittney after Lesbos, I have no idea, although I wonder if Santana’s newly turned leaf has anything to do with her. What did you think of the new Santana? Were you as confused by all of the character’s  career motivations as I was this episode? Was your viewing of that Rachel/Santana scene affected by current news stories? And do you feel like Glee is about to go full-meta with this Rachel TV show? All show-within-a-show conspiracy theories are more than welcome in the comments...

Next week: Peter Pan; June Squibb; written by Chris Colfer. Should. Be. Interesting.

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