But not all memories can be a Valerie good time, and Puck’s song is a revised version of the truly weep-inducing “Keep Holding On,” originally performed by the whole Glee club for a pregnant and struggling Quinn in season 1. That version ended in sad but supportive tears, and this one just ends in a lot of tough memories. Quinn wants to be able to forget her past and look forward, but Puck thinks she shouldn’t be ashamed of it, though “That’s why you’ve got to keep holding onto your past" is maybe not the most convincing allusion. Extra points for hand-grab dancing continuity. B+
Glee Emotional Checkpoint: We’ve hit Fun, Sexy and Sad, so now it must be time for Disconcerting Rage. When everyone gathers for the mandatory Diva-Off vote – “a pointless vote in a meaningless contest that has absolutely no practical ramifications whatsoever” – Santana has some things to say about Rachel. They ain’t good. Santana says that Rachel has sold everyone in the room out in order to succeed (except maybe Rick, aka, Ryder), and oh, by the way, she didn’t really win prom queen either. Rachel, who has learned how to express herself a little more calmly since her original choir room quarreling days, tells Santana she just wants make to feel her bad because she’s “better” than her, exits stage right, and promptly goes to the bathroom to cry.
Mercedes goes to check on Rachel and they have their moment, because unlike Santana and Rachel, they can't actually stay angry with each other long. They were both underdogs in high school, with tormentors that they occasionally had sing-alongs with. But while Rachel feels like she can’t escape those feelings from high school, Mercedes uses her memories of that time to drive her determination. She mentions that sometimes the voice trying to tell her she’s not good enough is Rachel’s, which is something I wish they would talk out just a little more, but they settle on being happy for each other. Of course, they both still want to be “bigger and richer and more famous” than the other…probably in a similar way to Barbara and Beyoncé, thinks Rachel.
Biffster is still floating around the high school that he didn’t go to, so Quinn decides to come clean about her two biggest seacrets (it was a typo and I'm keeping it, and maybe tattooing it on my lower back): the Seacrest tattoo and giving up Beth for adoption. McDimplebutt spends an inordinate amount of time dwelling on the tattoo and then he gets really low, like, Is this a human that exists? low: “You walk around acting like you’re some Snow-freaking-White, but you’re really just a dirty little slut bag.” Quinn grabs his stupid, pompous honker for a quick reprimand, but then Puck jumps in to deck him and throw him in the dumpster in a bout of violence that seems unnecessary, but isn’t really touched on again.
NEXT: Guess who's back...back again. Goop is back...tell a friend.