'Desperate Housewives' recap: Mommie Dearest, Part Deux

Dying for another storyline that’s seemingly going nowhere? Susan Delfino’s I’m-on-kidney-dialysis-and-trying-to-make-friends-while-I’m-getting-my-blood-scrubbed storyline. I don’t even know what to say about what’s going on with Susan anymore. She spent the episode trying to convince a guy not-so-subtly named Dick to play Scrabble with her. “You know, Dick,” she told the old curmudgeon, “sometimes when I meet people, they say you don’t seem like a Susan. But you…” That was about the extent of her story this week. I honestly almost forgot that she was there. Sad.

Bree, meanwhile, was still dealing with growing pains in her relationship with Keith. A mysterious woman named Amber James appeared at Bree’s house asking for Keith. Eventually, Bree learned that Amber had a kid with Keith when they dated several years before, but Amber left Keith before he even knew she was pregnant. Bree, however, kept the news from Keith, and relayed to Amber that Keith didn’t want to have anything to do with the little boy, Charlie. What this basically sets up is the future demise of Bree’s relationship with Keith, when he learns the truth. Yawn. Brian Austin Green should probably take off his shirt several times before this arc ends and he’s off the show, so at least some good comes of all this.

Renee, finally, had her own story arc this episode that didn’t include her going head-to-head with any of the established ladies on the Lane. This week we found her decorating the bedroom of Bob and Lee’s new, adopted daughter, which came with the revelation that—totally, totally didn’t see this one coming—that Renee had, at one time, wanted children. Cue Bob and Lee bringing their new daughter over to Renee’s house, followed by Bob asking Renee to be on call when the gal needed help or advice from “old auntie Renee.” Renee agreed, but then Vanessa Williams served up her gem quote of the evening: “And if she ever calls me ‘old auntie,’ I will kick her.” Can I just reincarnate as Vanessa Williams please? Thanks.

Finally, we circle around to Paul Young and his increasingly meek wife Beth. As we saw last week, Paul has learned that Beth is Felicia’s daughter. So this week consisted of him being really creepy and planning a weekend away at a remote cabin where, as far as I could tell, was planning to kill her for all the lies she’s spun. But just before they were to leave, the police arrived and showed Paul the gun that was under Beth’s pillow at Bree’s last week—and Paul recognized it as Zach’s and not Beth’s. Thus, Beth is spared, at least for the moment, and it seems that Paul will now pursue Zach instead. Is he going to go after his son? Seems possible, especially when you’re as deranged and rage-filled as Paul Young. As a somewhat nice button on the whole thing, Paul told Beth after he recognized Zach’s gun: “Trust me, Beth, I think you dodged a bullet here.” That made me smile.

Also, shouldn't the writers have somehow incorporated Larry Hagman into Paul Young's storyline? I thought that would sort of be part of the idea, since they're sort of playing Paul's storyline as a "Who shot J.R.?" type of thing. Anyway, maybe that's not it for Hagman, but seems like the wink potential of that whole thing could work nicely.

But what do you think of last night's episode, Desperate Housewives viewers? Do you think Paul is going to tussle with Zach soon—or will we have to wait until the season finale in May? Is there any juice left in this Gaby-with-baby-doll-obsession storyline? Are Bree and Keith long for this world as a couple? And just how soon do you want Larry Hagman to return for another episode? Let me know in the comments below!

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