Dancing With the Stars recap: Thanks for the M&M-ories

A week ahead of the Switch-Up, the original couples offer their spins on "The Most Memorable Year of Your Life''
Ep. 03 | Aired Mar 31, 2014

ABC

Danica McKellar and Valentin Chmerkovskiy: 36/40 Their contemporary played out like a Dancing With the Stars fantasy of yesteryear -- I could never have dreamed that TV's Winnie Cooper would be cloaked in white sparkles, surrounded by floor-stars, and letting Val expertly twirl her during that magnificent aerial view. But that's just a snapshot of what was an extremely fluid (and sharp where it needed to be) dance, punctuated by Danica's natural lightness and delicacy.

She danced it for her son, Draco, and her grandmother who'd passed away just before she could meet him. A part of me felt sorry for the shy guy for having to soak in the spotlight, but mostly I was enamored by the way Danica knew he'd watch this years down the line (not by choice, I'm guessing) and realize that according to the message of Billy Joel's "Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel)," she super-duper loved him a lot and would never really leave him even when she died. Ha ha, maybe it was too much for the young child. I don't care! I was sobbing and I LOVE WHEN THE TELEVISION MAKES ME CRY, so just leave me alone, okay?

"They can't make me switch, can they?" Danica whined to her partner. Of course they can, Val set her straight. But fear not -- he'd hold a candle for her.

"I'm a one woman man," Val assured her. "So whoever that woman is…." he joked. OH, THAT VAL.

 Amy Purdy and Derek Hough: 36/40 Oh my God. Oh my God. That home video footage of Amy dancing with her dad before she walked again after losing both of her legs to bacterial meningitis is, once again, the stuff DWTS dreams are made of. MORE SOBS. Oh, sweet sobs! Amy dedicated their contemporary routine to her dad, who'd given her one of his kidneys when this all went down in 1999. "How do you say thank you for that?" she blubbered. Oh, sweetie. Obviously you go on Dancing With the Stars and put on a brand-new pair of pointed-toe feet! That's exactly how you get 'er done.

In addition to loving the multiple cuts to Amy's teary-eyed parents (her mom looks like Susan Sarandon), I was living for Robin Roberts' instant reaction/girl-are-you-seriously-gonna-make-me-cry-AGAIN? face:

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She held off actual tears WAY better than I did. That's why Robin Roberts is an on-camera professional and I am a damp sofa-slug. There is room enough in this world for all of us! For now, anyway.

NEXT: Kym Johnson sighting! Plus: Charlie White and Cody Simpson #bevyofblondes

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