Dancing With the Stars recap: Hey, Sexy Ladies

Team 'Gangnam Style' turns in the wildest, nude-iest freestyle the ballroom has ever seen
Ep. 10 | Aired Oct 23, 2012

THROW IN THE LOINTOWEL Gilles refuses to give up.


Apolo Anton Ohno and Karina Smirnoff: 27/30 Apolo's samba with Julianne is likely pictured in the Dancing With the Stars sections of high school history textbooks at this point, so expectations were high for this week's guilty pleasure "Give It To Me Baby" samba. Apolo's performance itself was a total 10 for me -- he completely embraced the porny '70s vibe thanks to a loaner bedroom set from Bruno (Tom again!) and a sick leopard-print shirt/white pants combo that would put anyone in the mood to get down, get down. He couldn't help but mouth all the words to the song, but it wasn't as annoying as you'd think. For a guy who had the flu all week, Apolo seemed about as "into it" as you could get without vomiting, especially following that incredible pirouette on his knees.

I liked how DANCMSTR Goodman claimed to be living in the "Home for the Bewildered" after Carrie Ann claimed something was missing from Apolo's dance and that the pair needed to work on their chemistry (sounds like someone's still blaming Karina for her onstage meltdown last week) because when does Len not live there? Every time Bruno lifts one bun off his chair, or Carrie Ann falls off of hers, he's livin' in that Home. No matter what his seatmates do, Len is bewildered. That's his thing. Of course, Len's sudden realization of his surroundings in season 15 confirms that he truly does belong in the Home of the Bewildered -- he's its most profitable patient! He could be running that damn home. Who's to know for sure? Not Len!

Just a thought: Apolo is out there trying to have a freaking blast every week -- and it's true that something is not quite right. Whether it's Karina reciting script-friendly lines during rehearsals like "This is our comeback week" (sparklebarf) or Brooke daftly cutting off Apolo just when he was on a roll sarcastically marveling at his own deliciously cheesy leopard silk shirt, our speed skater can't seem to bullet ahead into his own icy hot atmosphere on Planet M. this time around. He's up for so much fun right now, and it seems little is to be had. Can this be fixed?

Melissa Rycroft and Tony Dovolani: 27/30 Speaking of no fun, this couple had to tiptoe through a "Toxic" tango due to Melissa's neck injury -- not anyone's fault, of course, but an injured celeb never makes for a pleasurable dance-viewing experience. I will say she looked amazing in that short, auburn wig. If only mad scientist Tony had been cooking up some sort of neck-numbing magic potion during this enigmatic opening scene featuring a strange hamster wheel.

I wonder if it's too late to be this for Halloween. Any of it, really.

This was also fab:

Is anyone else super excited for Tom vs. Len: Dance War (ft. Tony's Facial Expressions), coming to ABC this spring? I couldn't get enough of their little feud regarding Len's comment that Melissa could have "snapped a little more" during the tango. Tom pointed out she'd been carted away in an ambulance just two days ago. "That was more of a factual comment -- in an attempt to find your beating heart," explained BergerEmmy.

Oh, Tom. Where would we be without him? (Probably outside, soaking up real life. Pffft! Don't need it!)

Who do you like headed into (groan) (or are you cheering?) Country Week? Discuss!

Fringe Fairy

Read more:
Monday's recap: I Took No Time With the Fall
Carrie Ann falls out of her chair -- a GIF gem
Maks in short shorts on 'Ellen': 9 important screenshots
Your Hidden Gems of Week 4!

Video reply time! Ask Annie anything about 'DWTS' -- or whatever -- below.

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