Image credit: Douglas Gorenstein/NBC
THE GREATEST ADVENTURE Team Power, before the fall.
4. The Taglines.
Team Power had to come up with a nice straightforward way to describe their Interactive Experience. Lil Jon offered an abstract thought: "Once you know...you'll be there." Trace threw out a more straightforward catchphrase: "You + South Africa = Adventure." The second he said it, he winced, sensing that that idea was just stupid enough to become the actual tagline. And sure enough, it was. Trace didn't dwell on it too much. "You polish my turd, I polish my turd, and we'll all end up with shiny s---," he explained. "That should be a song." The man is a genius.
Meanwhile, Team Plan B was struggling to come up with their own tagline. Lisa suggested: "Romance Beyond Safari." Gary offered two follow-up suggestions, which were actually just him rearranging those three words: "Beyond Safari Romance. Romantic Safari...beyond."
It was a big episode for Gary Busey The Poet. Later on, Lisa told him that she was feeling cray cray. "Crick crick?" asked Gary. "Cray Cray!" said Lisa. "You know what that means, right Gary?" "Sure, Queequeg! It's your middle name! Lisa Queequeg Rinna!" Then he went to go play in the tree, while Lisa danced under a green sheet. Penn made a joke about french-kissing Gary. Cabin fever was setting in.
5. Win one for the Zipper!
Penn the Project Manager explained that the Great Zulu Interactive Experience marked a first for him: It was the first time he ever bought alcohol. (Of course, if this has been an authentic first-purchase-of-alcohol experience, Penn would have bribed a hobo or borrowed his older brother's ID. Ah, youth.)
"I've never drank alcohol before," Penn said. "I've never drank alcohol either!" said Trump, desperately trying to look cool for the Vegas magician. "Not a sip?" asked Penn. "I've had a zip," Trump explained, saying the word "sip" in the weirdest way possible. "A zip," he repeated. Penn one-upped him: He hadn't had a sip. "Not a zip?" asked Trump. "Not a sip." "Zip?" "Sip." "Zip!" "Sip?" "Zip!" "Sip." Then they just stared into each other's eyes for a long time, and no one said a word, and the two men imagined that they could see a little bit of the other man's soul. Or perhaps that was just their own soul, reflecting back at them.
Then Gary Busey ran into the room wearing a shark-suit and screamed "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE MOST DANGEROUS THING IN THE WORLD IS?" and farted.
NEXT: The Passion of Brande