Big Brother season premiere recap: Most Valuable Pizza Boy

The summer reality crazyfest returns, with a bigger cast and gamechanging new twists. Also, something named 'Aaryn'
Ep. 01 | Aired Jun 26, 2013

THE BIGGEST BROTHER OF THEM ALL One of these people is a train conductor. One of them is a lifeguard. One of them is a pageant coordinator. One is an "entrepreneur." And yet, for some reason, the show insists that only one of the houseguests is unemployed.

Cliff Lipson/CBS

So it was down to McCrae the pizza boy and Nick the "entrepreneur." Nick decided to make the first move, asking McCrae for immunity if he stepped down. McCrae was quick to say yes. Too quick. "I like you. I think you and me can work well together. I'll do nothing, I swear to god. On my life. On my anything." That is not a good pokerface; as McCrae admitted in the confessional, he would've said anything to get Nick off that popsicle.

Maybe I'm misreading the Pizza Boy, but he seems like a guy who will either A) run rampant with his first-week power and make everyone angry, or B) immediately fall victim to one of the charismatic/hot people in the house and make himself a target for another faction in the house. But I like the dude, because again, he's Otto from The Simpsons and Jay from Clerks. And he has a catchphrase: "Pizza boy's deliverin', baby!"

The houseguests reassembled in the lounge for another message from Julie-Clone XV. She further explained the new twist. The Head of Household will nominate two people. But each week, America will vote for the houseguest they believe is playing the best game; that person will be named the Big Brother Most Valuable Player, or BBMVP, and they will make the week's third nomination. The identity of the BBMVP will be secret. Theoretically, someone on the block could nominate somebody; theoretically, the HoH could win BBMVP and nominate a third person; theoretically, someone from your own alliance could nominate you, and you'd never know.

Now, look. This radically alters the game in a way that could become annoying. Frankly, it almost seems like being the Head of Household is now the worst job in the house; it's entirely possible that you could nominate two people and see them stick around for another week. (Actually, it's entirely possible that you could nominate two people, have one get off the block with the power of veto, nominate a third person...and see none of your nominees go home.) Additionally, this could put entirely too much power in the hands of the viewers. Will Big Brother voters choose the "best" player, or will they just choose the most likable -- by which I really mean the least offensive? There's a reason the Democrats and the Republicans usually wind up choosing the most boring presidential candidates. By trying to eliminate floaters, will the MVP twist actually encourage floaters?

Still, I am cautiously optimistic about this twist. It adds a whole new power dynamic to the game. The secrecy of it reminds me a bit of the misbegotten "Saboteur" twist from a few seasons back. But unlike the Saboteur, the MVP isn't just an agent of chaos; he/she can actually radically affect the game. Also, anything that makes Big Brother housemates more paranoid is okay by me.

But what do you think, fellow viewers? Are you intrigued by the MVP twist, or do you think this will be thrown out by the midway point, like last year's "Coaching" mini-calamity? And which of the new housemates vibes like a winner to you? Can Elissa actually form an all-female alliance? Is Jeremy actually a serious player, or is he just a hunk of muscle meat who waltzed into two accidental alliances? Will Dudebro and Aaryn join together in a showmance, and if so, will they spend the whole summer talking about Dudebro's hair? Will the women of the world ever stop despising Jessie just because she's got a great personality and good looks and she's so pretty and talented? And what if the big twist is that McCrae was actually Joe Millionaire the whole time?

Follow Darren on Twitter: @DarrenFranich

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