Amber Holcomb, Pink and Nate Ruess' "Just Give Me a Reason": Oof. This was embarrassing. I'm sorry but you can't just choose something and not learn the lyrics. Choose something easier if you have to! Amber was a mess here -- scared, uncomfortable, barely finishing any of the lyrics, and way out of her league. Absolute waste of time. What are we supposed to get out of watching someone not know a song? Put it on your damn iPhone and learn it!
"Well, I like your jeans," said Nicki before suggesting Amber should be more like "that free-spirited girl in the video footage…WHO PEOPLE LOVE" when she's onstage.
Candice Glover, Bruno Mars' "When I Was Your Man": I liked how she didn't seem too worried about singing from a man's perspective -- who cares? As Keith said, Candice could have sung "When I Was Your Giraffe" and it still would have been "a winning performance" based on what only Candice can bring for show and tell. Mariah was totally spot-on (!!!) in that "Candice knows how to take any song and use the musicality to change it to suit her" and that this sets her apart from the other contestants.
"I don't know if you lost weight, but baby girl, you look good," said Nicki. Translation: "Are you hotter? I just noticed you." #RAGE
Kree Harrison, Carrie Underwood's "See You Again": I understand what Keith was saying about the disconnect between the setting (Kree and Hot Guitar Player Brady sitting on stools with a fiery corona in the background) and the power ballad nature of the song -- but I loved this! Look, at this point, Kree is not going to emotionally connect with the song in the way the judges want her to, and apparently like Kree now wants to after doing some "soul-searching." But those vocals are just too damn good. I felt like she really thought this was her own song, and it would have made sense as an understated spin on the song at her own concert.
Randy advised Kree to use Carrie Underwood as a "diagram" for her career, Mariah enjoyed Kree's "authenticity," and Nicki said "I don't know if I'm biased because of my Kreedom, but I loved my Kreedom performance." #WHATDOESTHATMEAN
Nothing! It means nothing! I got the answer!
Esteemed Colleague Email Interlude:
OMG. IT IS.
NEXT: 'YO, where we going with all this music?' --a fool