Then Candice Glover took on Alicia Keys' "Girl On Fire" -- I wasn't wowed, to be honest, in that she's been mentioned so much I expected something astounding to happen during her solo. But she made some excellent pitch choices, enough to twist the song into her something she owned during some moments. During others it seemed like the song was containing her in a somewhat awkward way. I like her so much, I almost wish she could "come from behind" as the underdog this season. (That might be Kree Harrison's job; see below.) But that's fine -- better to be shown at all, I suppose. And don't get me wrong -- she's excellent.
I may as well start referring to Zoanette Johnson as Rude Gallagher because her audition with an original eloquently entitled "Ba Ba Da Duuhhh Dub" was basically "performance comedy" that some people may find amusing but most would be like WHAT? NO. She got up there and "went on the drums and we just winged it," said Zoanette, the band scowling incredulously behind her as she barked out orders. She's got so much spirit! But where was the singing? Who cares if she can (not) play the drums? I still have no idea if she could turn in a real vocal performance that isn't just screeching. Maybe we'll never know?
"WHERE MAH STICK AT?" was the climax of that "song," and also the best line. The other lines she thought up on the spot, and they referred to her surroundings. I think we can all rest assured Mariah Carey was not amused when Nicki and Randy got lengthy, slobbering affirmations of their existences and then all Mimi got was "And then there was Mariah…." Burn! And also, a major burn on the scores of talented vocalists who got cut so that Rude Gallagher may prank us all again.
Maybe she'll turn out to be a real singer and we'll all fall in love with her during this nebulous, three-week-long Vegas round! Probably not.
Shubha Vedula inspired Mariah to sing along with her fingers during her cover of "When You Believe," providing the diva with "a nice moment for me, personally." I know we were all on the edges of our seats waiting for the moment per episode during which Mariah would be the most flattered. Kudos to Shubha! Then Juliana Chahayed -- have we ever seen her before? -- sang a snippet of "Landslide," apparently one of Nicki Minaj's favorite songs. Juliana is only 15 and reminds me a bit of Arya Stark from Games of Thrones, in the face. Anyone else see it?
NEXT: Oof, Kez Ban