'The Amazing Race' recap: Women of the World, Unite!

When Chad said, "I just don't wanna lose to a pair of girls," I realized something: I really, really, really want a pair of women to win Amazing Race this season. Yeesh, it's crazy that an all-lady team hasn't won in 16 seasons. It's even crazier when you consider the makeup of the five teams who set off for Bangladesh at the start of last night's episode. To me, Team Doctor and Team QVC represent the twin pinnacles of Race strategy. Kat and Nat are athletically fit world-travelers who thoughtfully plan out every move they make. They're not dilettantes -- Kat was willing to toss two decades of vegetarianism overboard to win a challenge -- but they have the sensibility of generous patricians. (Notice how Nat was the one person on last night's episode to address the Rickshaw builder by name.) Brook and Claire don't have their global street smarts. What they do have (or what Brook has, at least) is a boundless energy for competition and a complete inability to feel embarrassed…which is arguably a more powerful travel tool, when you're trying to convince your cabbie to drive 120 km/h down the wrong side of the street.

Next to that, the three remaining couples look a bit shrimpy. Chad's a legit athlete, but he's a bit of a duncecap when it comes to the whole "cognitive thought" thing -- I mean it as a complete compliment to Chad's good taste when I say that Stephanie is way smarter than him. I've come around to liking Team Tattoo, but they're this year's Dating Models: They seem to function purely because neither of them ever bothers to think up a strategy. (There's plenty of evidence that neither Nick nor Vicki have ever actually watched Race.)

That leaves Jill and Thomas, and even though I still worry that their victory will cause the Great Old Ones to rise from their cosmic slumber and rain merciless brutality upon the human race for eons to come, I gotta admit: the Dark Prince is a serious player. Last night's episode began with what looked like a typical race-flattening trip to the airline. Teams had to fly to Dhaka, Bangladesh, and the first flight available wouldn't get them there until noon the following day. "Oh well," shrugged everyone. Chad yelled "Cheesburger!" and made for the food court. (Unnoticed at the back of the pack, Kat and Nat caught a plane to Dubai…without booking a second connecting flight.)

But the Prince of Darkness wasn't taking "Noon" for an answer. He pestered the travel agent with the practiced dead-eye glare that you can only truly develop after untold millennia of torturing the souls of the damned. "Could you check more?" he inquired. "You're checking more, right?" Thanks to his unearthly magic, a spot opened up on a much earlier flight – sending the gorgeous pair to Dhaka SEVEN HOURS EARLIER than the others. "No eating on this team!" exclaimed Thomas proudly, as Chad bit into his graham-cracker crust.

NEXT: Team QVC announces the winners of the "Biggest Idiots in the World" contest.

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