6. Trump Tangents
There are few things I love more in life than when Donald Trump goes off on one of his random tangents that have nothing to do with anything. And there were plenty such tangents in the latest Boardroom. They came fast and furious after it was announced that Plan B had bested Team Power. So what was the first incisive question that Trump asked the losing team? Well, here ya go: “Dennis, are you happy that you got tattoos? If you had to do it again, would you get tattoos or not?”
YES! Let’s clear this up right now! Forget about the task. And the invisible Omarosa tears. And getting to the bottom of who should be fired. Are you happy that you got tattoos? Finally, we’re talking about the real issues that matter. Issues like…LIL JOHN’S GRILL!
This got Ivanka playing along as well. “Is the grill removable?” she asked. It is, Lil John answered. “Oh so the grill is actually removable?” replied a clearly fascinated Donald. “And what do you have to do, use a little glue to put it on? It’s pretty wild!” I agree, WILD! To all those people that complain that Celebrity Apprentice does not need to be two hours long — which is pretty much every person in the world but me — I present this as Exhibit A as to exactly why the show needs to be two hours. While little asides like this would be editing room floor fodder on most shows, they are precisely what makes Celebrity Apprentice the twisted genius that it is.
But I think my favorite Boardroom non sequitur occurred later when Trump said, apropos of nothing: “This is our 13th season. We’ve had a tremendous run. We continue to do unbelievably well. People love this show. I don’t even like to call it a show. It’s beyond a show.” He’s right! It is beyond a show! It’s a state of mind. And that state of mind can be described in a single word: Busey.
7. La Toya Chooses Not To Keep Her Enemy Closer
Usually, Donald Trump is the one making inexplicable decisions in the Boardroom. The type of decisions that awarded Joan Rivers victory over Annie Duke and allowed Gary Busey to outlast seven other people on his first season. But this time it was La Toya who caused Ivanka Trump to drop her pen in shock (although I do have to wonder if that was an out of context shot added in out of place for emphasis). After bashing Omarosa time and time again for being an awful person and an awful teammate, La Toya announced she was bringing Brande and Dennis back to the Boardroom with her. What the…?!?
NEXT: Deputy Jackson…or not